Hewwo chums. Here’s an oldie.

I cacked this out in 10mins last night as a request from my mate Colm who has a blog. A blog with the most repulsive colour scheme and graphics in the history of gick. His writing is great though. We share the same ropey childhood memories of being dragged up in Tallaght.

Read his story here and Everybody hates Nigerians. I love ya Colm but visiting your blog makes me feel ill. Change it immediately.

Check out the scans

Nealy finished the new Amperduke story.

Hey it worked when I posted about a shit Philips MP3 player I bought. We were stung with the ropiest dinner in Mother Reilly’s Restaurant in Rathmines Dublin on Saturday. It ruined the weekend. Not really but it was crap. Straight from the microwave and measly meat. So avoid Mother Reilly’s Restaurant in Rathmines.

This is a gem. The first panel is by Barry Hughes, the middle one me and the last one Dec. It was done last Thursday at the Comic Jam. Not as gay as it sounds, it really is fun. Heres the site, the pages aren’t up yet but there were some doozies

I’ve been in a terrible mood all week. Mostly because of seeing that film Juno. God I hated it. That girl.
What a shithead. The dialogue. That witty dialogue. And that gay music. I hate soundtracks. Quirky. I’d rather hear the death rattle of my only child.*

The words ‘quirky’ and ‘zany’. I had a design job where the boss would want everything to be ‘Fresh and Funky’. I would respond with playing Call of Duty for an hour. He was a plank. A classic example is how one day I had a blue box designed and he said he wanted it more ‘regal’. I took the print out back, dossed online for an hour and then ran in with the same print out and he exclaims ‘”Now THATS a regal blue”.

*Stolen from David Cross

Hickery Dickery Dock
Some slob was sucking my cock
The clock struck two, I dropped my goo
I kicked the bitch out on the next block.

Andrew Dice Clay Vs Bill Hicks, coming soon to Spazzmoid. I used to think Bill Hicks was great but after exhaustive studying I realised he was mediocre and the greatest surprise was that I laughed more at Dice. People who deify Bill Hicks need to get out more.

Look at that, thousands of people chanting nursery rhymes. I love it. My exposition on Dice is coming soon. How an idiot who is plainly not funny is my favourite comedian. He cracks me up.

Drew a page of Spazzmoid over the weekend.Here he is, everyones’s favourite recycled weak joke…..Judge Bwed!

Explanation here for all you heathens

Aww

Hey comic fans! Here’s Wolverine as he should be. An ugly, smelly old rascal. With his gock hanging out.

I’m by no means a comic expert but my favourite rendition of Wolverine was that Deathblow and Wolverine team up, he’s drawn as a tiny little block with a big mongo brow and nostrils. I always imagined him like that.

Or like this lad

A pack of Meanies to anybody who can tell me Wolvie’s origins in one sentence

Another post mentioning that fucknut Quinn. Back in the dizzle when I was designing souvenirs etc I added a nod and a wink to him in one of my prototype designs. Flarn, as all regular readers will know is a secret word used only by a select few.

Ah those were the days, drawing teddies and leprechauns non stop.

Neh, I have nothing to say or show today. Went to the zoo yesterday instead of going to work, was planning on going to see the Bodies exhibition but then I realised I don’t need to see poor little Chinamen with their skin flayed and their wangs hanging out. Do Chinese call their wangs ‘wongs’?

There we go, now I’m back into it. The last time I went to the zoo was around 2001. I was working in a bakery 8pm-8am and was sleeping minus 2 hours a day, living off eating snots and Maltana bread. Quinner calls up at midday and invites me to go to the zoo with him. I protest that I’m in work at 8 and he calls me a fag so I go.

Went into town, bought some shit videos as usual and then to the zoo. No, we managed to get lost and beforehand and wandered around Islandbridge and bought Cornetto’s from a small shop where my apartment block now is. I only remembered that yesterday. I never thought I’d end up living there. I threw a stone at a wolf and clocked him on the snout. Q stroked around 12 fake lizards from the gift shop.

Quinn with his harem of shit tapes

We went for a pint then I went to work. Did my shift and as usual when I go past the 24hr mark, I can’t sleep. I was up for nearly two days. This story has no point other than that I can see and appreciate how everything has changed from those days. Life is mad. It struck me that the NEXT time I go to the zoo will probably be with my kids.

Result! Q’s trophy for playing darts. What a man