November 29th, 2006
The Meanie of Life
Last Monday I left the house to go to work. I was still reeling from the very recent break up from my girlfriend of nearly 6 fucking years. Jesus even typing it hurts. For the previous 6 Mondays I left the house facing the terrible weather with a smile, knowing that soon I’d be made redundant from my day job and could lie snugly in bed with her listening to the rough wind and rain outside. But now the biting cold and wind was just that. I have to move out, find somewhere to live, somewhere to work and spend Xmas alone. To say I was depressed would be a little bit of an understatement.
I always choose to walk across the field instead of using the footpath. Probably saves me around 2 minutes but I like it. And that day I felt it was fitting to walk alone in a dark field, I lap all that shit up.
The wind pushed me back and I forced through it with same childish thoughts that I’m a German soldier retreating from Russia that I always get. Don’t ask, I just do.
At the bus stop the usual young school kids were there acting the bollix and messing about, they seem like decent kids and I always like to hear what they have to say to each other. One of them took the chance to use his coat as a wind sail and fly a few feet. The wind was that bad. But the kids were still having a laugh compared to me and my fellow grim faced adults. The girl was eating a pack of Meanies. I thought ‘that can’t be a healthy breakfast’ but then I realised I was having a cigarette for mine.
She was laughing and I was miserable, thinking of just going home back to bed when I felt something like a cold kiss on the cheek.
It was a Meanie that had flew out of her hand . It was stuck to my face. Nobody saw it. I opened my mouth and in it flew. And it made me laugh. And I knew that there has to be hope in all this horrible mess.
Boo fucking hizz-oo.
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November 29th, 2006 at 9:59 am
Nice one Bob, keep your head up Bro!
That reminds me of the time I stayed over in your gaf and woke up with a cheesy wotsit in my mouth!
November 29th, 2006 at 11:13 am
You’ll be grand, just give it time!
If you have no job, home and girlfriend (!!) you could move abroad…?
November 29th, 2006 at 2:08 pm
Dont worry - I’m feeling your vein……
November 29th, 2006 at 2:20 pm
You know I know man. Things’ll turn around just steer clear of sinead o connors nothing compares to you and any james blunt cack for a while. Regarding above story you’re like a little tallaght rumplestiltskin spinning gold from desolation (or straw).
November 29th, 2006 at 2:31 pm
You’ll look back on this bad patch one day and laugh. I know it doesnt feel like it now but you will - i’ve been there.
November 29th, 2006 at 2:32 pm
Ah ballymount - best concentration of slacker emotional wrecks since clerks!
November 29th, 2006 at 2:39 pm
Bob sez: Thanks geezers, yeah Japan might be an option next year, still have to learn the language, I’m stuck in Anne and Barry mode. Big shout out to the Ballymount Massive, I can see Repro right now and there’s 3 lads outside having a smoke and a laugh just like the old days
November 29th, 2006 at 2:42 pm
Bob sez: Oh yeah anyway, the jokes on her, a bunch of knackers moved in next door! Unce Unce Unce Unce Unce
November 29th, 2006 at 4:26 pm
Feelin’ for you Bob, but i think this’ll give you diarroea of the creative juices, love loss and all that. i’ll expect genius. no pressure.
November 29th, 2006 at 5:23 pm
at least you dont have crabs
November 29th, 2006 at 5:24 pm
or get migranes before during and after shooting your load! bad buzz!
November 29th, 2006 at 11:43 pm
@Poncho
HA! I got that for about a week (the migranes!)
I went to the Doctor and he said “stop feeling guilty”. I thought this was odd as I wasn’t feeling guilty.
Turns out most males get “coital headaches” about once in their lifetime. There is no explanation for it. They last for a week or two, and happen just as you’re about to empty your bag.
Strange…
November 30th, 2006 at 4:11 am
Wait a sec… you put your cheesy wotsit in Brian’s mouth?
November 30th, 2006 at 6:00 am
When I saw the pic I thought for a second a ‘meanie’ was some new dublin slang for a ‘gob’ I was pleased for a milisecond that this wasn’t the case, but then read the rest of the post, see you soon dude, hang in there!
November 30th, 2006 at 8:28 am
Bob sez: Thanks lads, ah I still feel poxy. I’m sure if it was summer I’d feel better. Just thinking about xmas is a killer, fuck it. I CAN see the funny side of it all though.
Amazing about them jip headaches lads, I remember you went to the hospital about it and they laughed you out of it Ponchy. I get headaches when I DONT take one off the wrist.Hold…..on….. Ahh thats better
Bren, if anything this will hinder the operation. need a place to draw.
November 30th, 2006 at 7:11 pm
yeh! fuckin hell. Tought i was having a fuckin aneurysm so i bolted down to tallaght hospital.
Doctor : “so you’re suffering from meningitis”
Me: “no! im getting migraines”
Doctor: ” when do you get them”
Me: “directly after i orgasm”
Doctor (while punching my arm and chuckling) : “mustve been some orgasm!”
prick only offered me some mild pain killers and said “these things happen”
they eventually went away, could have been something to do with me gimpy spine and wanking while hanging upside down in a room with 2 strobes going.
The current headaches are during sex, when i shoot and directly afterwards. pack of gay!!!!
-p
November 30th, 2006 at 10:31 pm
Fuck! I used ta get those jism migraines too! Thought I had a fucking tumour. How did this conversation start?
December 1st, 2006 at 8:37 am
Bob sez: Ah my boys, my dear boys.
December 1st, 2006 at 9:52 am
jaysus, how many of us have gotten them??. its probably due to straining our eyes while knocking one off at a computer.
December 1st, 2006 at 10:57 am
I’ve never gotten them and besides you had never heard of it before.Freak
December 12th, 2006 at 12:53 pm
[...] Friends and pals, lissen diss: As mentioned, The Grinch wants me out of her house. I need a new place to live. Finding a house share situation with 12 Polish lads is easy but obviously I need somewhere where I can continue to draw, have an internet connection and a pole so that I can slide down into the kitchen like Batman. [...]
December 26th, 2006 at 9:22 am
this story makes me even more happy.
dig the last pictar espeially.
the one with the meanie!
meanies the seond best crispever
just behind NikNaks
Fuck i Love NikNaks