Bob's Christmas
I don't like Christmas anymore. It's just a pain in the hole. Part of the reason why
I feel the magic is gone is that I can easily buy Santa caliber pressies for myself
all year round and I do. Some people say they love the lounging around just eating,
drinking and smoking spliffs but I can do that anytime I want too.
But this year I've tried to inject some magic back into it. Since I first got into eBay way
back in 1999, when you knew where you stood with free porn and smileys and pop-ups
were just a twinkle in some wankers eye, I scoured it looking for a toy of Rosebudian
proportions: The Lil Playmates Space Station.
I first bought it with my Communion money in Rathfarnham Toy Shop and it was the best.
The games and scenarios I used to play with it were better than any cartoon or comic, sometimes it'd be red against yellow, or red and yellow against the aliens or all of them working
together to mine space coal. I had to give it away when my family moved to Canada and
like big fat Citizen Kane I've laid awake pining over it.
When I saw it, complete and boxed on eBay I snapped it up, it was delivered around 3 weeks
ago but I havent opened it. Saving it for Christmas morning in the hope that seeing it and all the rest of my pressies will make me feel something. I don't know, it'll probably just depress the shit out of me but maybe not. Just thinking of it now and a faint trickle of excitement runs down my back, (beats a trickle of excrement down my leg)
I really want to play with it, PLAY with it, bold and italics man!! Not just the same way I'd fiddle with an eBay purchase with my cold adult eye then shelf it, I want to relive those classic
adventures as I remember them. I'll probably have to inject bleach into my head to get the
required state of mind or get a kid to play with me. With the wonderful world of the internerd
our kids will never have to worry about finding the elusive childhood toy or resolving questions
they'll have about cartoons they used to watch, it'll all be instantly attainable and recalled. And that's probably a bad thing.
So Mewwy Christmas one and all! Fuck the lot of yiz I got my Space Station.




I feel the magic is gone is that I can easily buy Santa caliber pressies for myself
all year round and I do. Some people say they love the lounging around just eating,
drinking and smoking spliffs but I can do that anytime I want too.
But this year I've tried to inject some magic back into it. Since I first got into eBay way
back in 1999, when you knew where you stood with free porn and smileys and pop-ups
were just a twinkle in some wankers eye, I scoured it looking for a toy of Rosebudian
proportions: The Lil Playmates Space Station.
I first bought it with my Communion money in Rathfarnham Toy Shop and it was the best.
The games and scenarios I used to play with it were better than any cartoon or comic, sometimes it'd be red against yellow, or red and yellow against the aliens or all of them working
together to mine space coal. I had to give it away when my family moved to Canada and
like big fat Citizen Kane I've laid awake pining over it.
When I saw it, complete and boxed on eBay I snapped it up, it was delivered around 3 weeks
ago but I havent opened it. Saving it for Christmas morning in the hope that seeing it and all the rest of my pressies will make me feel something. I don't know, it'll probably just depress the shit out of me but maybe not. Just thinking of it now and a faint trickle of excitement runs down my back, (beats a trickle of excrement down my leg)
I really want to play with it, PLAY with it, bold and italics man!! Not just the same way I'd fiddle with an eBay purchase with my cold adult eye then shelf it, I want to relive those classic
adventures as I remember them. I'll probably have to inject bleach into my head to get the
required state of mind or get a kid to play with me. With the wonderful world of the internerd
our kids will never have to worry about finding the elusive childhood toy or resolving questions
they'll have about cartoons they used to watch, it'll all be instantly attainable and recalled. And that's probably a bad thing.
So Mewwy Christmas one and all! Fuck the lot of yiz I got my Space Station.










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