My how times have changed. I hate the phrase ‘Trick or Treating’ but yesterday I used it. I just couldn’t think of what we used to call it and said to a kid ‘So are you going out…Trick or Treating?’. I have always tried to resist the gradual invasion of American lingo such as ‘ass’ instead of ‘arse’ and ‘pavement/sidewalk’ instead of ‘path’ but I now admit defeat.

What did we use to call it? I think it was ‘Halloweening’. It wasn’t just ‘Are you going out dressed as C3PO with a Dunnes Stores plastic bag?’. We used to say 'Help the Halloween Party'
when they opened the door and then scraped slices of apples off a plate into our bags. Driving through Tallaght last night I got a good glimpse of the modern kid’s impressive level of costume, I was thinking how these days nobody would have to resort to the age old poverty stricken costume of an Arab with a bed sheet and tea towel on the head when I saw a few kids with bin liners taped to them.

That was always a step below the Arab. Pulling a bin bag over the head and some crap face make up has been the standard issue Halloween costume of poor kids forever. 'I'm a witch' they'd say but their costume would say 'My parents are alcoholics and pissed away the Childens Allowance'

Were Bonfires always that terrifying? Or was I just kept away from good ones? Driving home we saw some huge ones, through Aylesbury, Killinarden and Jobstown it was clear that the poorer the area, the bigger the bonfire. When I was living in Aylesbury I went over with my mate’s kid to the Church sponsored bonfire and it was the gayest thing ever. It was around 4 feet high, behind a cordon and worst of all a nun stood on front of the cordon. Even the smaller kids were confused as they could clearly see the massive dangerous fires blazing in the distance in Killinarden.

Another move away from the old style shitty Irish Halloween is the games. I’ve heard from 2 parents that instead of bobbing for apples/money and swinging an apple on a piece of twine for kids to bite at, they now have a Halloween Pinata that showers the kids in mini Mars bars. That head in a basin full of water game always started off well until it was full of snot by the time the third kid was up.

2 kids called in last night so it’s Chickatees and Meanies for dinner till Sunday. Wahey!

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A clamtastic design but it doesn't really say anything. I mean there's no mention of MBLEH or clamnuts on it. They sold well. Better than I thought. Incidentally, Mero you bollicks (of Rejected Records and Secret Record Shop fame) took the last 5 off me and then evaporated with the cash for them and a few a comics. You'll be got.

I'm getting new shirts done soon of the brilliant clam ghost logo and will be selling them at a resonable price because of the promotional nature of them. Saying that, I was in Marathon Sports or whatever during the summer and saw some absolutely ridiculous 'walking billboard/gobshite chic' stuff, one of them had 'I love Nike' repeated over all over it and another was along the confrontational lines of 'if you're not down with Reebok, get outta my face'. And the kids ands inbreds lap this shit up like it's insulin.

I done a 'photo shoot' of Quinner modelling the shirts when I first done them. I have them all lumped in the same folder but in some of them he has a shaved head and in the others has hair down to his arse. Mad.

Yeah the one on the right was photoshopped (not the hair) but you have to love the one on the right, completely unedited. Such pride and exhuberance. He won that trophy at a toast eating competition or a 'Toast Off' as the kids call them.

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